Michael finally uses his Rocking Chair

He's been too mad, too physical, too unsettled but not today! Today he sat in his rocking chair and rocked himself! YAY Michael!

To Carol

I wrote a letter to Carol. Something I intend on adding to the Auction site. A letter that I first sent to Scott that he might read it to her before I posted it. I wanted to tell her how much I care for her and I wanted to let people who may visit the Auction site what Carol means to me. I want people to understand what a special person she is and know as I know the depth of this tragedy...

You’ll forgive me if I indulge in my own sentiments for a moment. For there are individuals that affect your life in a truly significant way and for me, Carol is one of those few people.
I don’t recall the exact instance this clarity of understanding occurred. I do, however, remember vividly the petite, glasses wearing elementary student. A permed brunette, lover of all things purple and unicorns-- and even better yet, purple unicorns, who at the age of 8 already exuded a fashion forward confidence and magnanimous personality. People have always been drawn to Carol and I was no exception.
I am able to mentally scan through the archives of my mind, sifting through the utilitarian filing cabinets, plastic-covered bins and crowded sock drawers overflowing with the moments she and I have spent with each other, the memories we created and I am grateful.
Grateful for so much laughter, buoyed up by the stolen moments wherein we opened our souls to each other under heart-covered comforters in our parent’s living rooms. Morose over the shenanigans we survived and overwhelmed by the purely, unadulterated love that I feel for her.
Photographs of our teen years capture many of our moments in still. Looking through these photographs I am unsurprisingly struck by the continuing recurrence of Carol and I posing next to each other, most often holding onto each other, regardless of who else might be in the photograph. This is not surprising because it is how I always wanted to be and to find that this sentiment had been captured in pictures for me was genuinely pleasing.
You see, I have always been in awe of Carol, admired her in so many ways, looked up to her and desired to emulate her. The compassion and love she exudes, the fun, fly by the seat of your pants attitude she proudly dons. The tutelary friend she has always been, the devoted mother, the ardent wife. This is the type of person I would like to be. This is the person whose friendship I sincerely treasure.
As I have had the opportunity to sit at Carol’s hospital bed in these last few months, resting my hand on her shoulder, soundlessly praying for her comfort, her character of strength and solicitude has never waned.
We have cried together, we have chatted like the high school girls we once were and we have sat in silence, comforted merely by the other’s presence. Carol has been asked to face challenges that would have fell Goliath sans pebble and she continues to do so with grace and determination.
We are now both in our 30’s, mothers of small children, busy with life and there have been times where the circle of perpetual schedules has come between our contact with each other and that is something I deeply regret. Regardless of the frequency or lack there of or the distance in miles between us, I am eternally grateful and abundantly thankful that our lives paths crossed so many years ago. To me Carol has always been and will always be one of my dearest friends, someone who holds a very special place in my heart.
In the eye of this tragedy I have never been more aware than as I am now that I am not alone in my sentiments. There are so many who care deeply for Carol, for her family, for her well-being. What a wonderful testament to the outstanding person she is to witness the outpouring of love and support that has come from so many in these past few months.
I say “Thank you” to each of you because you have reaffirmed my belief in the compassion of strangers and loved ones alike.
“Thank you” because, selfishly, I need to do something in this situation and “Thank you” because I know Carol would want nothing more than to say it to each of you herself.
~ Erica

To Carol

You’ll forgive me if I indulge in my own sentiments for a moment. For there are individuals that affect your life in a truly significant way and for me, Carol is one of those few people.

I don’t recall the exact instance this clarity of understanding occurred. I do, however, remember vividly the petite, glasses wearing elementary student. A permed brunette, lover of all things purple and unicorns-- and even better yet, purple unicorns, who at the age of 8 already exuded a fashion forward confidence and magnanimous personality. People have always been drawn to Carol and I was no exception.

I am able to mentally scan through the archives of my mind, sifting through the utilitarian filing cabinets, plastic-covered bins and crowded sock drawers overflowing with the moments she and I have spent with each other, the memories we created and I am grateful.

Grateful for so much laughter, buoyed up by the stolen moments wherein we opened our souls to each other under heart-covered comforters in our parent’s living rooms. Morose over the shenanigans we survived and overwhelmed by the purely, unadulterated love that I feel for her.

Photographs from over the many years of our friendship capture many of our moments in still. Looking through these photographs I am unsurprisingly struck by the continuing recurrence of Carol and I posing next to each other, most often holding onto each other, regardless of who else might be in the photograph. This is not surprising because it is how I always wanted to be and to find that this sentiment had been caught in print for me was genuinely pleasing. These captured images still hold some of my happiest memories to date.

You see, I have always been in awe of Carol, admired her in so many ways, looked up to her and desired to emulate her. The compassion and love she exudes, the fun, fly by the seat of your pants attitude she proudly dons. The tutelary friend she has always been, the devoted mother, the ardent wife. This is the type of person I would like to be. This is the person who's friendship I sincerely treasure.

As I have had the opportunity to sit at Carol’s hospital bed, resting my hand on her shoulder, soundlessly praying for her comfort, her character of strength and solicitude has never waned.

We have cried together, we have chatted like the high school girls we once were and we have sat in silence, comforted merely by the others' presence.

Carol has been asked to face challenges that would have fell Goliath sans pebble and she continues to do so with grace and determination.

We are now both in our 30’s, mothers of small children, busy with life and there have been times where the circle of perpetual schedules has come between our contact with each other and that is something I deeply regret.

Regardless of the frequency or lack there of or the distance in miles between us, I am eternally grateful and abundantly thankful that our lives paths crossed so many years ago. To me Carol has always been and will always be one of my dearest friends, someone who holds a very special place in my heart.

In the eye of this tragedy I have never been more aware than as I am now that I am not alone in my sentiments. There are so many who care deeply for Carol, for her family, for her well-being. What a wonderful testament to the outstanding person she is to witness the outpouring of love and support that has come from so many in these past few months.

I say “Thank you” to each of you because you have reaffirmed my belief in the compassion of strangers and loved ones alike.

“Thank you” because, selfishly, I needed to do something in this situation and this Auction became that and

“Thank you” because I know Carol would want nothing more than to say it to each of you herself.

~ Erica

Here's what I've been working on...psst, pass it on

Noah and I are seated at the dining room table working on his Math homework when we hear the most lovely singing ring out. It is obviously Grace. She is loudly customizing her own melody and so I get up to possibly join in or at least get a better listen to. Low and Behold the singing is coming from the bathroom. Makes sense. Supposedly the acoustics in a bathroom are much better which is why so many of us find our selves silently impressed by our own chops as we serenade ourselves in the shower. But it gets better! I open the bathroom door to praise Grace and her obvious talents only to find her seated on the toilet, pants around her ankles, Guitar in hand! However the guitar is not a guitar but a cello-- "Obviously, Mom!" and the child does not stop when the door opens instead she sings louder. The moment that her so-called stage fright kicks in is only after the camera is brought out.
"Oh, Grace, Please don't stop singing to me!"

I envy Sleeping Beauty

Michael is again not sleeping.
First it was problems with our insurance-- My small child takes enough medication to fell Goliath without the rock. Then it was his stomach problems. Again, partly due to insurance, mostly due to his unfathomable ability to control his bodily functions. The boy was so constipated he just plain hurt! And now he has an ear infection! We are both banged up from his justifiable frustrations and sleep is a novelty. Last night, or rather this morning we finally fell asleep at 5am after a solid 10 hours of crying and pinching and hitting and kicking.
On the up side (and there is an upside or I would probably not be typing) Michael is now on antibiotics that should help him feel a lot better, cross our fingers...

SUPER STAR!

Lexis called at about 1:30pm this afternoon to ask if I could bring her one of her volleyball uniforms after school. She went on to tell me that the Varsity coach had come up to her and asked if she would play on her team this afternoon in a special Varsity Tournament!! Lexis was obviously thrilled as was I! I am so proud of her!

After going through the disappointment of being placed on the Sophomore team at the beginning of try-outs about a week ago to now one game later being asked to play with the Varsity team-- just awesome!

Lexis was quite disappointed about her placement and we had talked about her options because of that. The first night she was mad enough to want to quit volleyball. We talked about the pressures that she puts upon herself to be the best and the frustrations she feels when some things don't come to her as easily as others. I explained that learning and growth is natural and expected in everything we do and her comment to me was "than I am just going to work really hard to be the best player on the sophmore team and help the other girls that are on it as well." When I spoke to her about the option of me talking to her coach and asking for her insight, Lexis said she would do it on her own and she did. Then today I watched as the Varsity Coach called Lexis specifically over at the beginning of their first game to sit next to her and then proceeded to explain to Lexis what should have been done by the other girls on the court. By the second game Lexis was put in as a starter for the Varsity team!

She did really, really well! Worked hard, stayed right in the game and really kept the team's spirits up! It was awesome to watch! (Unfortunately, I was watching between trips back and forth to the house and then to drop off and pick up Grace from her soccer practice!) But how fun and what a great happening for Lexis! I am so very proud of her, for her dedication and strong will! She is purely awesome!

Oh, and I almost forgot! Lexis said that at the end of the Tournaments the Coach's comment to her was, "See you at practice tomorrow!" ...Lexis glowed!

Oh so touching!

Michael's First day of School

IT stays at Dad's House!

So Grace and Noah convinced me that they had earned enough money between the two of them to buy a hamster! I am personally not a fan of rodents in the least and most who know me recognize that fact to the extreme. But with Verl's okay that the hamster could live at his house, I agreed to take the kids to the pet store to check out there options.
We started by visiting a couple of different pet stores and Noah and Grace walked excitedly around together checking out their options. With the agreement that a pet was not coming home with us that day, they both did an excellent job of squelching their pleas and suppressing any attempts at flat out begging. Using a pen and paper my adorable duo went around each store making a list of the items they would need and a few they just wanted along with the price tag attached to each. Returning home they sat huddled on the floor adding and subtracting with a whole lot of scheming thrown in...

Happy 24th Birthday, Beaner!

Lexis is a 10th GRADER!!

First day of School for Noah & Grace

Today was the first day of school for both Noah and Grace! Can't believe our summer is already over! Noah is in 5th grade!!!! And Grace in 3rd! Now that is something I can't believe! They both headed off to elementary school with their giant books in hand(Grace is reading "Twighlight" and Noah the 4th "Harry Potter.") They had cute outfits on courtesy of Grandma T--"Thank you, Grandma!" Both surprised me last night with brand new hair cuts. (Not sure why their dad is always cutting off all their hair but that's for another time...) I walked Grace to her classroom and she was quite nervous about going in. Back to school jitters as well as the fact that the other students were already seated and the announcements were being read. I then walked back by Noah's classroom, he is in a class with 8 boys and the rest girls!! He was busy listening to his new teacher go through class rules while picking his nose. :) --"Don't you tease him, Lexis!" Michael doesn't start pre-school until next Monday and Lexis starts 10th grade!!! tomorrow morning. They give the freshman an extra day of school to figure things out without the upper classman around, of which I think is an excellent idea. Lexis being an upper classman, for Heaven's sakes, didn't start today. Grace's comment to me after school today was, "It was just like any other first day back, Mom." Right. Makes sense. They are out at 1:30pm all week in order for SEPs. Eases us all back into it, I guess. Here's to another great school year!!

Pinch an Inch

I think Michael gained atleast 5 lbs. in Washington! He's almost too, TOO heavy for me to carry him around. I hear he ate chicken nuggets like crazy while at his Dad's and he even started drinking V8 juice!!

Moving Time

I headed to San Diego to help Carly move this past week, courtesy of Mom! ("Thank you, Mom!") Can't believe we didn't take more pictures, these are taken by one of Brandon's roommates, not Carly but Colin. :) They're neither Carly's or my favorite but what do you do. A huge part of not taking more pics was the fact that we were so crazy busy the whole time! Moving is a job and I am so glad I was able to be there to help Carly out! We packed and packed and cleaned and cleaned. Then cleaned and cleaned and unpacked and unpacked! We did get in some fun as well. BBQ at Brandon's, a Charger's baseball game V.I.P. style which was lots of fun and the whole trip I ate more awesome food than I should have... Burritos and more burritos! Super yummy Brunch, twice! Crab Crackin'Monday and amazing BBQ Ribs to name a few!
Her new landlords mentioned that she could paint the walls and I squeeled like a little girl (to take a quote from Noah.) I painted Carly's kitchen walls RED! and that was tons of fun! I think it looks great and Carly agrees. Her new place is very cute, little scary in location--"sorry, honey"--but true. I also got to see her teach her first day's Stats class at UCSD as Professor Thurston! That was really awesome! She is a fantastic teacher and it is definitely what she should be doing in life!
Here's the BEFORE kitchen and an After will be posted soon.